What You Can and Cannot Control

There will always be something present in life you cannot control. People, situations, circumstances, something someone says or does; there will always be a place where you have no control over external factors in life. But, the one thing you can control is yourself.

Despite the things that go on in life that you can’t control you can always keep yourself in a place of control. Some people say and do things just to get a rise out of you to see how you will respond, especially if they knew at one point they could really push you overboard. You have to learn to limit yourself and not feed into this negative behavior and energy. Some people thrive off drama, confusion, and chaos; it’s the only thing they ever want to know.

Meditative practices are a good implementation tool when being faced with people or situations, and circumstances you can’t control. Take time within yourself in the very moment of confrontation to remain calm and tell yourself, “there is nothing I can do to control this situation,” or “there is nothing I can do to control what this person is saying or doing.”

Regain your bearings, thoughts and emotions. Get yourself back into a positive place especially when someone is deliberately doing something to make you lose control. Drama filled people like drama filled things. Chaotic people live in chaos. But, you cannot control whether other people choose to live this way. Living a life of drama and madness filled with negative energy and negative instances are choices made individually.

Every thought, action and spoken word are done by choice. You can’t control anyone else in any way. I don’t care if you try to buy things, take them places or do things for them, you cannot control anyone else. You can only control yourself.

It can be very frustrating when facing situations or people you can’t control. Nonetheless, in the moment you have to ask yourself “is there anything about what’s happening right now that I can or cannot control?” If the answer is no, then you need to detach yourself from direct association of the uncontrollable situation(s) or person(s). It can be difficult when in a hostile situation but, the sooner you learn to be controlled within self the better.

You ever been in a place where you are confronted with a situation or person, and you knew it was completely out of control and you could feel a “heat” rising over yourself like you want to just explode? I have been there a time or ten!

As I have grown in life, I have grown to a place where I “check myself” when coming to a certain place where I have no control. The first thing I do is hold still and get quiet. If I say nothing then the situation won’t escalate any further. Inside I tell myself, “hold still.” Holding still gives you time to think things out before you actually respond. It also prevents something bad from getting worse.

Take time to reflect on moments where you could control things. Think about how you chose to respond to those situations. Was the outcome a positive or negative one? What could you do in future situations to deescalate or prevent stress and worry about things you cannot control? Consider ways you can reduce your direct attachment to things and people you can’t control.

Keep Growing and Glowing

– Lessynz


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